September 7th -- I've come to the conclusion that I just can't get anything significant done here. I was supposed to move out around four or five months ago but there's never any progress toward that end and I'm just slowly putrefying here where I'm at due to social anxieties, insane heat with no air conditioning, something going on with my eyelid, super-cramped quarters, only being awake at odd hours where I can't create sounds, and never having more than a few unknown hours alone to create sounds. I may try a few lyrics-only songs, but that's not really what I want to do.

July 4-14th -- Practicing... realizing my musical chops (which were just "okay" before anyway) have seriously deteriorated with the lack of use in the past year and a half. Also, trying to get the latest Automap to work with my keyboard and Reaper in a way I'm happy with. Also, reinstalling VSTs, since I moved to a new OS since the last time I really did anything significantly music-related. So far, added 4Front's TruePianos and Oatmeal. Will probably install Toontrack's stuff eventually. And then my Voxengo collection. Downloaded a few music theory practice apps and a metronome for my Android and have been using them off-and-on about every other day. Probably won't get to composing anything 'til next week.

[warning: if curse words offend you, even when not being used hatefully, although possibly gruesomely-descriptively, you may want to avoid me.]
[warning: if lack of proper capitalization offends you, even when not being used hatefully, although possibly gruesomely-inconsistently, definitely avoid me.]

Music doesn't come as naturally to me as most other forms of art. It's usually something I have to work maddeningly hard at to get something I'm actually happy with. Occasionally, something will explode in my head that works wonderfully almost immediately, but these are rare exceptions. I'll also often get caught up in the musical tool minutiae tweaking circus, make plans for the next decade instead of the next five minutes, and focus on the complicated and tiny details of things while attempting to bake up a pint of perfection.
My goal for this year's 50/90 is to minimize all these things. If something is sounding too generic and unoriginal, I'll try not to think about it. If the methods are "too easy", I will avoid the masochistic urge to increase the effort. If I'm struggling to get anything out at all, I'll strive to be happy dropping literally *anything* into existence, no matter how rough, inane, ugly, or just plain bad!
I've never really come close to hitting the 50, and I don't *really* expect to hit it this year either. But... we'll see what happens, and as always, I'm looking forward to it!
Also, skipped it last year due to life events that were a much greater priority, so the anticipation's been building for much longer this time!

I figure it's probably not cheating to get some titles down before the event, so this is what I've come up with...

50/90 song titles (a.k.a. "The Easy Part" a.k.a. "Not actually doing anything, but totally definitely talking about it. Really. Probably.")

1. Warm-up (instrumental)
2. I don't know what I'm doing (do I?)
3. Lyric and gear complexity avoidance
4. Boring rock song
5. Resisting the urge to write things
6. Nnnnnoope!
7. Okay, fuck it.
8. That didn't last long.
9. Stop! This isn't part of your goals!
10. Quick breather (instrumental)
11. Striving for mediocrity
12. That inevitable 12-tone experiment
13. Even I don't know what this is
14. Null terminated string constant
15. Oh god, not even close to halfway!
16. Optimism song in some dumb major key
17. Lyrics only, if you know what's good
18. for you (the rest of song number 17)
19. Today, I ate, slept, and peed
20. Ch-ch-ch-challenge! Wait... no.
21. One note for as long as the song is.
22. Halfway point in sight!
23. Halfway point in sight, part 2!
24. Halfway point in sight (the remix)
25. [insert an actual song attempt here]
26. Forget everything, listen, and play
27. AABB CDCD AABB CDCD ABC solo CDCD ?
28. simple,simple,simple,simple(simple)
29. IT DOESN'T SOUND LIKE MUSIC ANYMORE
30. a drum solo with other instruments
31. vocal solo ("the mic was off" take)
32. my favorite number
33. I've never been here before
34. Hello World. (thinks a bit) Die.
35. HELLBOUND DEMON FUCKING sugar water
36. song titles are useless (or useful)
37. if I had a piano with wings and fur
38. asterisk* *this may be an asterisk
39. Today I write what I don't know
40. Oh god, kinda getting close to 50!
41. There are nails in my eyes, and ow!
42. Not the question (or the answer)
43. Remember when this was gonna be fun
44. Discolectricretrorockafunkymetalpop
45. That last one was trying too hard
46. I can almost see the end of it all!
47. Sleep song (written while sleeping)
48. Come too far to fail it now!
49. Don't you wish you'd actually tried
50. The Process, The New Paths, and Now