Sober as a Judge

Sober as a Judge

standup's picture



Liner Notes: 

I thought I was done. But got home tonight with just ONE MORE IDEA. Reading about current politics, this seemed like a natural title for a song. I was sober as a judge when I recorded this, but for the right effect I probably should have been wasted, slurring, and slobbering in the mic. Maybe next time.

If there's any doubt, I think Kavanaugh is a lying piece of crap. Everything the protagonist says here is a bald-faced lie.

This is #31 for me, the most I've ever done in 50/90.


I'm judicial, not prejudicial
not an embarrassment
got the best temperament
whatever happened that night
I don't remember
my brain
is just a blender
all the girls want me
even if they don't
I don't remember
I was really stoned

I'm sober as a judge
sober as a judge
my brain is turned to sludge
sober as a judge

it was just a girl
I don't remember
she was nobody
not even a contender
I never drink anything
wouldn't entertain
anything stronger than
pure distilled grain

George Soros and all Clintons
want to see me in prison
that ain't gonna happen
I'm mister chill
I never touched a girl
against her will

Please keep your comments respectful, honest, and constructive. Please focus on the song and not the demo.


kahlo2013's picture

Congrats on 31! Glad you did this - love the awesome guitars and driving beat - perfect combination of energy and angst to deliver the pointed timely lyrics!

nancyrost's picture

Song I wish I'd written. Perfect.

barbara's picture

That hit the spot! Thank you!

mike skliar's picture

add me to the list of 'damn, wish I had written this'! what a perfect summation of the whole Kav. mess- brilliant, the idea, the execution, the recording, everything!

great work!

(would love to download this- can you check the 'download' option?

standup's picture

It's now downloadable if anybody else wants it!

rwc's picture

Really good song. The chorus is great - perfect ironic reuse of the old saying - and it's incredibly catchy. The feedback works really well and seems entirely fitting.

JamKar's picture

Wake up America, and listen to this song!

Fuzzy's picture

Congrats on beating your personal 50/90 record!
Great punk rock attitude and lyrics here.
Nice wailing guitar, too.
You know, as a Canadian, I just look to the south and shake my head.
Nice work!!

MarkG's picture

More truth here than a Senate testimony.